I actually love this time of year. All my childhood Thanksgivings were spent at family reunions at my paternal grandparents’ home in Central Texas, playing with my 13 cousins for the weekend. Even as an adult, Thanksgiving is spent with at least one branch of the family. My relationships with my extended family are strong, supportive, meaningful, and joyful, and the four living generations hold the same sense of love and connection. I am grateful for my experience of family.
My memories and association with the Thanksgiving holiday are a given. Even after the deaths of my grandfather and father, which happened in different years but both in the weeks just before Thanksgiving, family came together, and I learned real gratitude.
But I know everyone does not have positive experiences with family upon which to base their anticipation of this holiday. Or, even if they do, this may be a very difficult time.
Facing an unplanned pregnancy and with the many emotions around a day and a season that focuses on family could be very difficult to handle. What are you experiencing right now? What would help you to get through this time?
Becky DeGeorge, in her blog post “Gratitude, Shmatitude”, http://www.writingforresilience.com, asks, “What if for some reason, you can’t rustle up a thimbleful of gratitude?” She points out some of the possible or probable challenges that could make any person want to leave the country. Most people say we “should” feel love, joy, and gratitude but sometimes, we don’t feel happy and grateful, no matter what the commercials say. Becky offers a way to cope with the worries, losses, and pain that may be taking the joy out of your Thankgiving. She talks about use of writing as a way to experience what is real for you at this time, giving some excellent prompts to open the topics in your mind and your heart. I hope you check it out.
I have found that the practice of intentionally finding things in our lives, even tiny, seemingly inconsequential things to be grateful for can bring a greater sense of happiness and satisfaction. I read a coaches challenge to her group to find at least one new thing in each day to notice and be grateful for, and one woman wrote that she was grateful for hand lotion! I never thought of something so commonplace, and I had to agree. What would we do without so many of the small conveniences we have become so accustomed to being in our lives?
When you look around, can you find some little things that you are grateful for? Can you find 3 or maybe, with a little effort, 10? Like the warmth of the cat sleeping next to you, or that the sky is clear and blue, or that the bright color of the maple tree is a special treat you always enjoy this time of year?
Jim Rohn, a business speaker and philosopher, wrote that it is the little disciplines that make the difference between success and failure.
I think that is true in finding gratitude in life, as well. If, by intent, you LOOK FOR things for which to be grateful, looking in the simple, eveyday commonness that surrounds you, it is possible to lift yourself with a few positive realizations. When life is the hardest, most challenging, most scary, there are still so many little things that actually make life livable and even joyful, despite the hard stuff.
The INTENTION to look for those little things, is your choice–or at least it has been my choice, not just for this season, and, actually, now I practice it every day.
If you do go to Becky’s blog post and make the choice to write, I would like to suggest another gentle prompt: “When I take the time to look for things that are good, right, or supportive in my life right now, I find ________”.
I would love to know what you find, even if only one simple thing at this moment, like hand lotion. Please comment.
Happy Thanksgiving
